Congratulations on the birth of your baby and if this is your first baby, welcome to the mad world of motherhood.
The first few months following baby's birth can be full of love as you gaze down at your wonderful creation. However, in truth, it can also be a very challenging experience too. There is no instruction manual delivered along with your tiny bundle of joy and all of a sudden there are many waters you need to learn to navigate. It can be very overwhelming for new mums and mums who are adding to the brood, there is a lot to juggle. One thing for certain, you quickly wonder what the hell did you do with all your time before you had the baby!
So how do you navigate these new choppy waters?? Luckily we are living in an era that is overloaded with information. There are books and blogs on every imaginable subject. The sheer volume of information can be overwhelming in itself! So what is important to remember during this roller-coaster ride? Here are our tips to maintain sanity during this joyous but sometimes tumultuous experience beginning with the most important!
Take care of yourself emotionallyHormones are raging and you are crying at the ads on the television. Or have you caught yourself gazing at your precious baby and know that you are blessed but have no idea why you feel so sad? Have you gone mad? Not at all. This is a vulnerable time, commonly known as the 'baby blues'. I remember the best advice I received about the 'baby blues'. 'Day 1 and 2 you can feel either elated or indifferent to the experience of child birth, both are normal. Then boom, Day 3 and the hormones hit you like a fully loaded cargo train. Remember these are the baby blues, it is normal and a rite of passage to motherhood. Do not feel bad if you feel bad! You will get through this. Be kind to yourself.' It was so true. I kept that like a mantra in my head. Find someone you trust that you can talk too. Wear your heart on your sleeve and air your frustrations. There are plenty of forums for mothers available, like, rollercoaster.ie and eumom.ie, along with many facebook groups that you can reach out and connect to women and share experiences or seek advice. I personally found that piece of advice very important to focus on. Following my first pregnancy which ended in miscarriage and a diagnosis of PND (post-natal depression) I knew I was vulnerable and didn't want to revisit that dark and lonely place. On a serious note, if you are worried that you might be suffering from post-natal depression contact your GP. According to the Rotunda Hospital, Dublin, 1 in 8 women will suffer from post-natal depression so it is not uncommon. For more info on this condition check out hse.ie for more information on diagnosing and treating PND.
Mind yourself Physically
I admire the energy of the new mothers who contact me within weeks of having their baby, eager to attend a class or start training 1-1. I don't think I could muster up the energy to get dressed for the first 6 weeks after having my darlings! When you are considering going back to training, it is important that you have had your six week check up and have received the all clear from your health provider to exercise. There are conditions like diastasis recti (abdominal separation of the muscles that can occur after pregnancy) that will have an impact on how you train. It takes approximately 40 weeks to bring the baby to the world, it will also take time to heal and regain strength. So don't put yourself under pressure to get that Instagram ready body. Start off easy with some light walking, building up to brisk walks which will help improve your cardiovascular fitness and promote the production of happy hormones! Take the time to warm up and cool down after your walks. Wear a comfortable and supportive bra and drink plenty of water to stay hydrated. It is a great excuse to get out of the house with or without baby! I also recommend every mother to embrace their pelvic floor workout. If you want to jump confidently on the trampoline with your active children in years to come, minus the fear of wetting yourself, then girls start flexing those pelvic floor muscles. To help you identify these muscles, next time you go for a wee, stop the flow. That is the muscle you are concentrating on. (FYI only do this to identify the muscle. Do not do it regularly as it is not good for you.) When you have identified the muscles, to strengthen them all you need to do is squeeze. Hold for 5 seconds, release for 5 seconds and aim for 10 repetitions, 3 times a day. Just do it. You'll be thanking me in your 40's and 50's that you did!
Sleep
This is not a joke!
The best piece of advice you will hear, repeatedly is 'sleep when baby sleeps'. If this is your first baby, this is probably the only time you will be able to fully indulge in this advice. On subsequent babies, you have the previous ones to look after and entertain, so this little luxury will be a fond and distant memory. This is not the time to be house proud. All your family and friends know you have had a baby. If they arrive to find the house resembling something like a bomb site, they will not judge you and don't judge yourself. Choose sleep over hoovering, or scrubbing tiles, or whatever!! You need your rest and don't feel guilty for getting it. Even if you can't sleep, lie down and rest. You need to heal and you need all the energy you can get to look after a newborn. Get your partner on board. Daddy can be involved in the night feed too! If you are bottle/breast feeding you can 'pump and dump' the baby on daddy and try to catch up on some zzzz's. As a new parent, you might not even be able to tell the difference between night and day anymore. Sleep deprivation will do that to you. You just need to figure out where you can get some rest and you will be better able to cope with what each day brings.
Eat NutritiouslyWhen we are tired, we tend to eat quick fix food that are full of refined carbs and sugar. It's easy, convenient and gives you a burst of energy. It's understandable. As best you can, try and keep your kitchen stocked with healthy nutritious foods so it will be easier for you to make better choices. Nutrition is very important for every new mother, whether they are breast feeding or bottle feeding. Some of you may find that you literally don't have time to eat, but being prepared will help in the battle to staying healthy. Buy some ready washed veg where there is zero prep and you can just plate up. Cook handy one pot wonders, with few ingredients that you can throw into the pot and leave to cook while you tend to your baby. If you do have an opportunity to cook, do it in bulk so you can freeze and have healthy home cooked meals available on the most hectic of days. Instead of reaching for a cream doughnut for that burst of energy, keep healthier snacks to hand. Single pots of yogurt, healthy nuts, rice cakes with peanut butter, bananas all make for healthier and fast snack options. Do not focus on the excess weight you are carrying and try to skip meals. You need to eat and skipping meals will lead to further weight gain. Also, if you are breast feeding you need to take in an extra 500 kcals as breastfeeding takes up a lot of energy! Eat well most of the time and this will play a major role in helping your recovery post baby.
Don't sweat the small stuff
None of us are perfect, we are all just doing the best we can. Don't compare yourself to other mothers that you think have it altogether. Chances are they are freaking out too! Seek advice when you need to, but most importantly follow your intuition. It is your body, your baby and the truth is, mother does know best. It is hard work, it is exhausting, but it is the most precious time you'll ever have with your child. Ease up on the guilt, be kind to yourself and do your best to enjoy it, they are infants for a very short time. Before you know it, you'll be having the battle of will's with them during the terrible two's, freezing your toes at the sidelines of pitches cheering on the under 8's, debating the use of make up in a heated fashion during the tweenie years and screaming at them to get out of bed and wash themselves in the teenage era. The chaos never leaves, it just changes and you will forever be learning. If all else fails, tell your children what I have told mine. I will not be paying for any weddings, but I am willing to make a contribution towards counselling fees for any trauma endured during my reign as your parent!
If you are worried about anything at all regarding your health or your baby, don't hesitate to get in touch with your GP, local health nurse or healthcare provider. Remember there are no stupid questions and it is always better to be safe than sorry.
Our baby friendly classes, Babes in Arms, takes place in our studio in Straffan at 10am every Thursday morning. If you would like to join us you can Book here.
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